Febuary 7, 2017, 1:51 AM! A new member of my family was born! Her name is Maria Deiynne Kairos C. Oliveria. (I know it’s lengthy, but that’s what we have discerned) It means given by… More
Naughty, joyful, playful, intelligent, well groomed, and one of the best. Those were the adjectives people used to describe Tatay on his Necrology service last Friday.
August 2, 2016, my father came back home to heaven. It’s a very peaceful departure as others say because he just slept and didn’t wake up. For people who read this for the first time, tatay battled kidney disease. His diabetes caused complications to his kidneys destroying them to the point that he needed dialysis to “live longer”. He underwent hemodialysis for more than 2 years. Dialysis is a process in which a machine cleans the blood of the patient, preventing him/her from dying from blood poisoning. Those sessions extended the life of tatay for 2 years and we are happy about it. (Though, there are stories where a dialysis patient can live up to 15 years or more.) It depends on the dialysis center (maybe), but we are still happy that it extended the life of tatay with us.
It’s a Battle Won
They said that when you’re on dialysis, your time here on earth is already counted. Maybe that’s what Tatay meant when he told me that his time is already up. His life here on earth is up, but he started to realize that it was just only the beginning. He learned to pray everyday. Morning and evening without fail. He started to hear mass when he still can. We are catholics and we are happy when he started to go to confessions. To make this short, he truly prepared for his earthly departure and looked forward to his spiritual well being. Truly, it’s a battle won.
The Gravity That Pulls Us Together – LOVE
Kuya Boyet, Ate Maylene and Ate Ising, my cousins, were the first ones to help prepare tatay’s wake. As soon as the news broke, tatay’s colleagues were the first to extend their condolences. Even my friends from manila traveled here to Bataan and back to extend their sympathies at around 2:00am. Even my friends and Co workers from the Global Mission Center joined the funeral ceremony.
Teachers and principals from Bataan gathered for tatay’s necrology service. Even the provincial superintendent was there (only a selected few are being graced by his presence). The whole elementary school in our town declared half day classes to give way for tatay’s funeral. All in all, we are moved by the mass of people who loved and supported tatay. Our family is grateful and Thankful to all of you.
His Dying Wish
One moment that I remember was when he told me to0 do everything I can to avoid dialysis. That is his wish and I will do everything I can to avoid it. It’s my scheduled check up last week, but because of the wake, we have moved it this week. I will post an update about it as soon as possible.
Pray for the soul of tatay, Estacio Oliveria. Please also pray for my family, especially for my health and my fight 🙂
If you want to help us out to raise funds for my kidney transplant, click the donate button below. You can donate as low as $1!
Thank you so much!
For friends who read this for the first time, my name is Deo and I have an end stage kidney disease.
It has been 2 weeks since my last checkup. I started to get strict with my diet again (to avoid being bashed online). Seriously, to avoid dialysis for I am really afraid of it.
Me and my doctor’s plan is to set my operation next year, but will make the matching process as soon as possible. We are currently in phase 1. We set it next year to give way for my wife’s pregnancy. We have started the matching process now because we are afraid that the terms of Philhealth might change anytime soon.
So… What’s the latest?
The first phase of the matching is for my doctor to know whether it is safe for the donor to donate. He (the donor) was advised to do an abdominal ultrasound and blood testing. He already have the results. We will bring it on my check up on the 30th, so my doctor could see it.
How’s my health?
As for me, I still feel good. Almost all people that I meet say that I don’t look sick. Praise God for that. I am still working. My job at the Global Mission Center of Couples for Christ is manageable. The only thing that’s reminding me of my disease is the fact that I easily get tired, my foamy urine, the occasional pain in my kidney area and the everyday reminders of Nanay to watch my diet. Lol
How’s my fundraising?
I need 2 million pesos for the transplant procedure. As of now, we raised 3% of its. My friends from different places organized concerts, bowlings, and a film showing to help. Friends and generous people started to donate. As of now, we are selling shirts to raise funds. Check it out here.
Help that we look forward, too.
Please pray for me and my family. We are praying that me and my donor pass the PhilHealth z package. It is a very big help since it can take off 600,000 PHP from the operating cost. Please pray for us.
We also look forward to the financial assistance program of DSWD in my hometown. I will just need to complete all the requirements needed.
Lastly, as Mike said, rely first on solicitations, so we are doubling our efforts to do it.
You can help.
The funds we raised is still a fraction of the real cost. May we ask for your kind donations to help us reach our goal. If you have PayPal, just click the donate button on the sidebar or you can click here to know the options on how to help us. (You can donate as low as 50 pesos)
Please include us in your prayers. Thank you so much.
Last week, my good friend, Khong, messaged me on Facebook and asked, “What are your plans now? What will you do? What are the options? Whom do you fight this battle for?” His last question retained in my mind. To whom do I really fight this battle for? There were so many reasons that I have mentioned, and here are some parts of it:
“What are your options, Deo?”
My doctor said that as of now, there are only two options, go for dialysis or opt for a kidney transplant. We decided to go for the latter. Why? First of all, because of a better quality of life it promises. In dialysis, I would be hooked to a machine that cleanse my blood for 4 hours, 3 times a week. Secondly, I’m still young and there are plenty of things I still want to do. Third, it’s my parents wish not to undergo dialysis. And lastly, my doctor suggests that it is better to have it than to choose the other one.
So what is my decision? I must go for a kidney transplant.
“So this fight is for whom, Deo?”
First of all, I am fighting for my wife and my marriage.
I just got married to a beautiful woman in December of last year. Our marriage is very young. We have a lot of dreams and we are looking at a bright future ahead of us. I know that there’s no reason for me to surrender. I believe that with the help of God, those dreams that we dreamt and planned together, will become a reality. I also believe that this is just a hard start and good things will follow. With the help of God, we can surpass everything.
My wife is a very strong woman. When I first knew about my disease, she’s the only one that comforted me. She stayed strong. She acted as my foundation as I slowly build mine. With that, I honor her a lot and she’s one of the reasons why I fight this battle.
I fight for Nanay
Nanay is a very tough woman. My aunts always tell me that she is the strongest of them all. However, being a wife and a mother, I know that somehow, giving her heartache, such as this, could definitely tear her apart. Tatay has been already in this situation, so why am I to join.
I can see the hardships of Nanay as she takes care of Tatay. As I shared before, Tatay is on dialysis treatment. I just can’t imagine what she could feel if I would be plugged into a hemodialysis machine, too. I don’t want to give her another set of burden, even though I know the fact, that in case it would happen, she will remain strong, and won’t show any pain to us. I cannot forgive myself if something bad happens to her, and that is why Nanay, is one of the reasons why I fight this battle.
I fight for Tatay
Tatay is diabetic and that’s the reason why his kidneys failed. As I’ve said earlier, he is undergoing dialysis treatment. Right now, he is doing the procedure three times a week. Three months ago, he just had two sessions a week, but his edema (water retention) got worse. Seeing his fight, it discourages me to go the same path he’s in right now. His skin color has changed. He is bloated. He easily gets tired. He even went cardiac arrest many times when in session.
I know that it’s hard for him and I know that it would hurt him to see me suffering, too. That is why, this fight is for Tatay, too.
I fight for my friends.
The support I get from my friends are phenomenal. The moment they knew about my disease, they offered help as soon as possible. They even mobilize themselves to help me do fundraisers. They are one of the reasons I fight this battle.
I fight for my service.
I was in the community of Couples for Christ since I was in High School. I started as a CFC Youth for Christ and now, I’m a full time missionary worker of CFC Global Mission Foundation. I believe that God did not give me this disease if I can’t win over it. I want to serve more. I want to fight serving the Lord. If I go down, I will go down while serving Him. This fight is also for service.
Help me fight this battle, friends. I wish that at the end, it is us that wins. Help me to make my hope, our fight.
“Sampalin n’yo nga yan Doc (Slap him Doc)!” My mother burst in anger when she knew that I didn’t fully control my diet the past few weeks. It was the Couples For Christ weeklong anniversary celebration and I was one of the service teams. In short, I have to eat the service meals for a week, making my cholesterol and triglycerides soaring high… Again.
June 28, 2016. It was my second maintenance checkup after knowing my condition. We also decided to bring Roy with us so that if he has questions about the procedure, he can ask everything he wants to know. Roy is a cousin, a brother in Christ and a good friend who would want to donate his kidney to me.
He and Nanay departed from Bataan at 5:00 AM and arrived in NKTI at around 7:30AM. I arrived there at around 8:00AM and we waited in the queue. It was 11:30 when we are called in by Miss Helen, my doctor’s secretary.
“Kamusta ka (How are you)?” Chad (Richard T. Hizon. MD), my doctor, said the moment he saw me. He also greeted Nanay and Roy a good day. With no hesitation, Nanay immediately said that my cholesterol and triglyceride levels have risen. She also gave him my blood test results.
Chad browsed the test result and affirmed the numbers on it one after the other. “Hemoglobin, okaynaman. Spillage, okay din. Tumaas ang cholesterol mo. Kailangang i-maintain mo na talaga and Lypantil at saka Rosuvastatin (Your hemoglobin and spillage are okay but your cholesterol has risen. We have to get you back to Lypantil and Rosuvastatin again)“ he said. “Pero kamusta ang kain mo?Nakakapagpigil ka? (Are you still controlling your diet?)” he asked.
That question made me pause. I forced myself to think of something good to say, but he didn’t allow me to say anything, “Hindi! Huminto ka eh… Wag ka na… wag ka nang mag dahilan pa… Kabisadong kabisado ko na yan. Yung mga humihinto na ganyan bago sumagot, alam na yun. (No, Stop thinking of an alibi. Stop your excuses.)”
Nanay cut in and said, “Sampalin nyo nga po, Doc (Slap him Doc)” Chad continued, “Gustomo yatang ma-dialysis ng maaga eh (it seems like you want to get into dialysis early?)” “Your cholesterol and triglyceride will not rise this high if it’s only because we stopped the medicine. It is because of too much intake of food.” he continued. “Although the good news is your crea decreased. You were 4 the last time, but now it’s only 3.6”
Kidney Transplant 101
Chad wrote my meds on his prescription and I took that time to introduce Roy to him. I told him that Roy has many questions about the procedure. He stopped writing and gave us a short orientation.
“Kidney donation is relatively safe. A person can live with one kidney alone. That is why we always say on our lectures that the purpose of our other kidney is for sharing. Look at the kidney transplant patients. They only have one kidney, but still they live for a long happy life. It’s relatively safe. Nothing will change on you. You can still do the things you normally do. The only precaution we have is contact sports. We will advise you to shy away from Taekwondo or Judo or the likes.”
“I am planning to go to the gym.”
“There’s no problem in going to the gym, play basketball and any sports.”
“How about running and jogging?”
“It’s okay. Nothing will change in you. You still have the capacity to have a child and go to work. The risk of the operation is very small. The risk is less than 1%. Since the technology today is better, we will not “open” you up. We will just use a “telescope” and 2 days after the operation, you will be discharged.”
“Will it leave a scar?”
“Just a small mark.” Chad unbuttoned his polo to show his scar below his chest. “I underwent in that procedure, but I don’t know if the mark is still here.” The scar is small and unnoticeable. He got that scar due to his gall bladder. “You can still wear your bikini.”
“Will it hurt?”
“There is a post operation pain, but it’s manageable. During operation, you are on general anesthesia. One week after the operation, you can go to work and one month after, you can go the gym.”
It seems that Roy has no questions anymore, so I asked about the matching.
“Let’s start the work up. Let me run through the procedure. There are three phases. First, we will test if Roy has strong kidneys and if it’s safe for him to donate. If we can see a small sign that t donation is dangerous for him, we will stop there and look for another donor. You can do the lab tests and ultrasound at Bataan. Second phase is the matching itself and the third is the preparation for the transplant.”
Then it’s Nanay’s turn to ask.
“Doc if we can sustain his creatinine since it’s decreasing, let’s postpone the transplant till next year because his wife started to conceive.”
With surprise, Chad burst in joy. “Good!!! Congrats!!! Ang galing mo talaga! Bihira lang ang maka concieve na ganyan ang creatinine ha. (You are really good! It is very rare to conceive in that creatine level!).”
“It was really a miracle.” I said.
“That is why I told Deo to focus first on his wife’s pregnancy. This may stress his wife and might affect their baby.” Nanay continued.
“For me, I would beg to disagree.” Ako po, ang aim ko is as early as possible, ma-transplant si Deo oratleast ma approve siya ng Philhealth (My aim is that Deo have the operation as early as possible or at least be approved by Philhealth). Actually, the creatinine of 3 is already for transplant. Mas maganda po kasi ang pre-emptive. Ibig sabihin, hindi pa nadidialysis, itra-transplant na. (It’s better to be pre-emptive and do the transplant before dialysis.)“
Chad kept quiet for a while and thought of something! “We could also do this…” He said suddenly.
If you really want to concentrate on your wife’s pregnancy, let’s do the work ups first, then lets enroll to Philhealth. If it’s already approved, and if your crea is 3 or 4 and you don’t feel anything, let’s postpone the operation till next year. Kinabahan ako. Baka maubos ang pondo ng Philhealth (I’m worried about the funds of Philhealth). The system and the scenario might change. Sayangang P600,000.00. (We might not get the P600,000.00)” – He was referring to PhilHealth’s Z package.
Know more about PhilHealth Z package here.
“Kaya for the meantime nak, ingatan mo muna ang kidneys mo. Kung maaaring pangat nalang ang ulam mo. (For the meantime, take care of your kidneys. If it’s possible to eat only sour fish)” Nanay said.
“Wag naman po. Kawawa naman si Deo. (Have pity on Deo)“ Chad cut Nanay. “He can eat meat and pork as what the dietician told him. Just follow your dietician’s orders.”
He gave Roy the lab and ultrasound request and he reminded me of our meeting next month to check whether his meds work. With a firm handshake to me and Roy and a nod of respect to Nanay, he affirmed us again not to worry. We got out of his clinic at around 12:00. We went home, ate lunch and brought them to GMC (Global Mission Center). They arrived home in Bataan at around 7PM.